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Little Johnny wriggled uncomfortably on his psychiatrist's couch pouring out his heart, bewailing his inability to get any respect.
"What's wrong with me?" demanded little Johnny.
His therapist looked thoughtful. "Vell, you suffer der dilemma of both hating somevun, who fur the sake of anonymity we'll call Pee, und exalting diss Pee by vishing to be him. You hide your frustration mit ein toothy grin, pathetic miming und ein juvenile preoccupation mit sex."
"Nein, diss Pee is not der problem," he continued. "Und der diagnosis ist klar."
"You suffer von Pee-niss envy."