Top 5 Best Political Jokes

Current Rating: 3.75

Speaker's Corner is a traditional sounding off post for 'characters.'

The long-term commie speaker was saying:

Look at all the posh cars over there. My friends, when the day of liberation comes, every one of you can have a big car like that.

A voice from the back:

Not me. I like my little VW.

The speaker gets angry: My friend, when the day of liberation comes, you will do as you are bloody well told!

Current Rating: 3.67

"The U.S. army confirmed that it gave a lucrative fire fighting contract in Iraq to the firm once run by the Vice President Dick Cheney without any competitive bidding. When asked if this could be conceived as Cheney's friends profiting from the war, the spokesman said 'Yes.'" -- Conan O'Brien

Current Rating: 3.64

"You have all the characteristics of a popular politician: a horrible voice, bad breeding, and a vulgar manner."
-- Aristophanes

Current Rating: 3.6

A man died and went to heaven. As he stood in front of St. Peter at the Pearly Gates, he saw a huge wall of clocks behind him.

He asked, "What are all those clocks?"

St.Peter answered, "Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone on Earth has a Lie-Clock. Every time you lie the hands on your clock will move."

"Oh," said the man, "whose clock is that?"

"That's Mother Teresa's. The hands have never moved, indicating that she never told a lie."

"Incredible," said the man. "And whose clock is that one?"

St. Peter responded, "That's Abraham Lincoln's clock. The hands have moved twice, telling us that Abe told only two lies in his entire life."

"Where's Bush's clock?" asked the man.

"Bush's clock is in Jesus' office. He's using it as a ceiling fan."

Current Rating: 3.57

4 Doctors were talking shop one day...

An Israeli doctor said, "Medicine in my country is so advanced, we can take a kidney out of one person, put it in another and have him looking for work in six weeks."

A German doctor said "That's nothing! In Germany, we can take a lung out of one person, put it in another and have him looking for work in four weeks."

A Russian doctor said, "In my country, medicine is so advanced, we can take half a heart from one person, put it in another and have them both looking for work in two weeks."

The American doctor, not to be outdone, said "Hah! We took an asshole out of Texas, put him in the White House and half the country was be looking for work the next day!"