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Top 5 Best Obama Jokes

Top 5 Best Obama Jokes according to the votes of our surfers.
Don't agree with these? Then rate all the Random Obama Jokes you can. We have many other categories that need rating too!


In an orchestrated event to promote newer, more restrictive gun laws, President Obama addresses an audience of school children at a West Texas elementary school.

He stands silently at the podium and then begins to clap and pause, clap and pause. He does this for a while before speaking.

"Every time I clap my hands, a child somewhere in America dies from gun violence. Even a child should be able to see the solution." President Obama looks expectantly over the audience.

A little boy raises his hand. "Maybe you should stop clapping."

Current Joke Rating: 3.11

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Its hard to describe in one sentence the Obama legacy so far. What with earning a Nobel Peace Prize, getting U.S. troops out of Iraq and Afghanistan, closing Guantanamo Bay, trying terrorists in Federal Courts on U.S. soil, stopping the influx of illegal aliens, creating jobs, lowering the deficit, balancing the budget and cutting the cost of medical treatment while insuring the masses.

Some critics have asked the difference between Obama's accomplishments and a car battery.

A car battery has a positive side.

Current Joke Rating: 3.09

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A co-worker from my LAPD Communications days sent me an email with this from a Marine Gunnery Sgt:

"When I joined the Marine Corp it was illegal to be a homosexual, then it became optional. I'm leaving before Obama makes it mandatory."

Current Joke Rating: 3.08

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Flush from their Healthcare plan victory in Congress, the Obama administration is proposing mandatory Federal Auto Insurance.

Like healthcare, the government will fund car insurance for everyone who is unable to afford the increasing premiums by raising taxes on drivers who don't have accidents.

Current Joke Rating: 3.07

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When former top U.S. military commander in Afghanistan Stanley McChrystal got called into the Oval Office by Barack Obama, he knew things weren't going to go well when the President accused him of not supporting Obama in his political role as President.

"Its not my job to support you as a politician, Mr. President, its my job to support you as Commander-in-Chief," McChrystal replied.

Not satisfied with accepting McChrystal's resignation the President made a cheap parting shot. "I bet when I die you'll be happy to piss on my grave."

The General saluted. "Mr. President, I always told myself after leaving the Army I'd never stand in line again."

Current Joke Rating: 3.06

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