Top 5 Best Funny Puns

Top 5 Best Funny Puns according to the votes of our surfers.
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Current Rating: 3.33

Q: Why can't Chinese couples have white babies?

A: Because two Wongs don't make a white!


Current Rating: 3.23

Two ropes walk into a bar. They sit down and the bartender says. "Hey we don't serve ropes in here."

Both ropes get up and step outside. One rope says "I'm going to find another bar" and the other rope starts to ruffle and tie himself in a knot. "Well I'm going back in there, who does he think he is"

So the rope goes back into the same bar. When the bartender comes over and spots the same rope he says. "Hey didn't I just tell you that I don't serve ropes?...."

The rope says "Yep" and then the bartender asks "You are a rope aren't you?"

The rope replies "I'm a frayed knot."


Current Rating: 3.09

Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married.

The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.


Current Rating: 3.08

A man is waiting for his wife to give birth. The doctor comes in and informs the dad that his son was born without a torso, arms or legs. The son is just a head! But the dad loves his son and raises him as well as he can, with love and compassion. After 18 years, the son is old enough for his first drink.

His Dad takes him to the bar, tearfully tells the son he is proud of him and orders up the biggest, strongest drink for his boy. With all the bar patrons looking on curiously and the bartender shaking his head in disbelief, the boy takes his first sip of alcohol.

Swoooop! A torso pops out! The bar is dead silent; then bursts into a whoop of joy.

The father, shocked, begs his son to drink again. The patrons chant 'Take another drink'! The bartender still shakes his head in dismay. Swoooop! Two arms pops out. The bar goes wild.

The father, crying and wailing, begs his son to drink again. The patrons chant 'Take another drink'! The bartender ignores the whole affair. By now the boy is getting tipsy, and with his new hands he reaches down, grabs his drink and guzzles the last of it. Swoooop! Two legs pop out. The bar is in chaos. The father falls to his knees and tearfully thanks God.

The boy stands up on his new legs and stumbles to the left , then to the right, through the front door, into the street, where a truck smashes into him and kills him instantly.

The bar falls silent. The father cries hysterically. The bartender sighs and says 'He should have quit while he was a head!'


Current Rating: 3.07

"Doc, I can't stop singing 'The Green, Green Grass of Home.'"

"That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome."

"Is it common?"

Well, "It's Not Unusual."